Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince

Director:
David Yates (Order of The Phoenix)

Genre : Adventure / Fantasy

Main Attractions:
Daniel Radcliffe
Michael Gambon

IMDB Synopsis:
As Harry Potter begins his 6th year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, he discovers an old book marked mysteriously "This book is the property of the Half-Blood Prince" and begins to learn more about Lord Voldemort's dark past.

My Take:
1. When the fuck will Harry Potter have some really cool magic?
2. Can they somehow kill Ron? He’s fucking annoying.
3. Emma Watson gave us lots to peek. When will Hermione get naked in film?
4. How gay can Dumbledore get with Harry?
5. Are the books this boring?
6. J. K. Rowling should never write anything romantic.
7. What the fuck is Voldermort doing right now? Why can’t he just kill everybody now?

Something Like:
previous five Potters

Memorable Quote:
Albus Dumbledore: Did I know that I just met the most dangerous dark wizard of all time? No.

Final Verdict:
Still boring

Review : Race to Witch Mountain

Director:
Andy Fickman (The Game Plan)

Genre : Adventure / Fantasy

Main Attractions:
Dwayne Johnson
Carla Gugino

Synopsis:
Walt Disney Pictures resurrects one of their time-honored franchises with Race to Witch Mountain, a family-oriented sci-fi adventure that tells the story of two alien visitors (AnnaSophia Robb and Alexander Ludwig) whose search for their spacecraft gets them caught up in an adventure with a cab driver (Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson) and a UFO specialist (Carla Gugino). As the group races toward the mysterious mountain in the Nevada desert that has mystified scientists and paranormal researchers for years, the government, gangsters, and an extraterrestrial bounty hunter attempt to prevent them from reaching their intended destination. Should the two planetary travelers fail in recovering their ship, an alien invasion will be launched against the entire planet. The original 1975 picture Escape to Witch Mountain was followed by the sequel Return From Witch Mountain, as well as a 1995 made-for-TV remake.

My Take:
The typical feel good family/kids movie which don’t really make sense but carried a good message. But, don’t really give a damn. What I’m sure were two things: 1. The Rock was still as hilarious and 2. AnnaSophia is a major jailbait material.

Something Like:
The Last Mimzy

Memorable Quote:
Jack Bruno: You know what aliens look like! They're like little green people with antennas, and "Take me to your leader, Earthlings!"

Final Verdict:
AnnaSophia Robb… yumm !!!

Review : Romance X (1999)

Director:
Catherine Breillat

Genre : Romance / Drama

Main Attractions:
Caroline Ducey
Sagamore Stévenin

IMDB Synopsis:
Although deeply in love with her boyfriend - and indeed sleeping in the same bed with him - a schoolteacher cannot handle the almost complete lack of intimacy he will allow. Increasingly frustrated, she gradually finds her sexual appetites leading her into ever more risky situations, including a developing one with the headmaster.

My Take:
Another porn disguising as a proper drama. Although it’s French, when people have actual sex and starred by Rocco Siffredi made this movie an almost hardcore production.

The good thing was, the A-cup girl was quite cute. The bad thing, well, I guess I have to say the giving birth scene. Seeing a huge baby pushing his way through a woman’s vagina wasn’t fun. It’s quite disgusting actually.

Something Like:
Cossi Fan Tutte

Memorable Quote:
Marie: I gave my son his father's name. If someone up there counts souls, then we're even.

Final Verdict:
Porn

Review : Goodfellas (1990)

Director:
Martin Scorsese

Genre : Drama / Crime

Main Attractions:
Ray Liotta
Robert De Niro

IMDB Synopsis:
The story of Irish-Italian American, Henry Hill, and how he lives day-to-day life as a member of the Mafia. Based on a true story, the plot revolves around Henry and his two unstable friends Jimmy and Tommy as they gradually climb the ladder from petty crime to violent murders.

My Take:
This is definitely a great mob movie, although I do prefer ‘Casino’ better. Well, that’s just because I prefer having De Niro as the lead, rather than Liotta. Joe Pesci’s character was about the same in both movies and remains the main attraction.

Something Like:
Casino

Memorable Quote:
Tommy DeVito: He said, "No, you're gonna tell me something today, tough guy." I said, "All right, I'll tell you something: go fuck your mother."

Final Verdict:
Classic

Review : 17 Again

Director:
Burr Steers

Genre : Thriller / Horror

Main Attractions:
Zac Efron
Leslie Mann

IMDB Synopsis:
At 17 Mike O'Donell was on top of the world; he was the star of his high school basketball team, and was a shoo in for a college scholarship. And is dating his soul mate, Scarlett. But on what's suppose to be his big game wherein college scouts are checking him out, Scarlett reveals that she's pregnant. Mike decides to leave the game and asks Scarlett to marry him which she does. During their marriage, Mike could only whine about the life he lost because he married her. So she throws him out. And when he loses his job, he returns to the only place he's happy at - his old high school. And while looking at his high school photo, a janitor asks him if he wishes he could be 17 again and he says yes. One night while driving he sees the janitor on a bridge and apparently jumps in and he goes after him. When he returns to his friend, Ned's house, where he has been staying, he sees that he is 17 again. He decides to take this opportunity to get the life he lost.

My Take:
If you can let go on the fact that the main star was Zac Efron, this movie wasn’t really that horrible. It had some funny moments and a bit more lame one as well. Everything was as expected and easy to watch. And, I also like it because there’s Michelle Trachtenberg and of course Allison Miller.

Something Like:
13 Going on 30

Memorable Quote:
Principal Jane Masterson: Are you peacocking?

Final Verdict:
Not that horrible

Review : The Steam Experiment

Director:
Philippe Martinez

Genre : Drama / Thriller

Main Attractions:
Val Kilmer
Armand Assante

IMDB Synopsis:
A former professor (Kilmer) concocts a brutal experiment in order to get the word out on the effects of global warming. By trapping six people in an urban Turkish bathhouse, he vows to overheat his hostages unless his global-warming hypothesis is published on the front page of his local paper.

My Take:
The intention was good but the execution was horrible. Other than having a laugh when seeing how fat Val Kilmer was, there wasn’t really any interesting moment in this movie. Of course there was ONE topless scene but that was it.

Something Like:
Saw

Final Verdict:
Not that interesting

Review : Coming Soon

Director:
Sopon Sukdapisit

Genre : Thriller / Horror

Main Attractions:
Worrakarn Rotjanawatchra
Chantawit Tanasaewee

IMDB Synopsis:
What kind of scenes in a horror film scares you the most? When a ghost appears totally unexpectedly? When the main character does not see the ghost sneaking up behind him? When at the very end you find out that the main character was actually a ghost all along? But none of this compares to the feeling of arriving home alone and suddenly being stuck by a feeling of deja-vu that you are reenacting the very same scenes in the horror movie you just saw!

My Take:
I hate saying bad things about the mother country but this movie sucks. The whole premise was just ludicrous, the ghost was stupid and the scary parts were almost nonexistent. And to make things worse, why couldn’t they find a decent looking Thai girl to be the star?

Something Like:
The Unborn

Final Verdict:
Ridiculous

Review : Animal House (1978)

Director:
John Landis

Genre : Comedy

Main Attractions:
Tom Hulce
Tim Matheson

IMDB Synopsis:
Faber College has one frat house so disreputable it will take anyone. It has a second one full of white, anglo-saxon, rich young men who are so sanctimonious no one can stand them except Dean Wormer. The dean enlists the help of the second frat to get the boys of Delta House off campus. This film gives high-jinks and fooling around a bad name. P The dean's plan comes into play just before the homecoming parade to end all parades for all time.

My Take:
One of the earliest Lampoon series and it’s funny how some things just never changed. I think it had some hilarious moments and compliment well with their basic theme. I was actually expecting for a bit more nudity but I guess I can always surf for porn.

Something Like:
Old School

Memorable Quote:
Hoover: They confiscated everything, even the stuff we didn't steal!

Final Verdict:
Not bad

Review : The Last House on the Left

Director:
Dennis Iliadis

Genre : Crime / Horror

Main Attractions:
Garret Dillahunt
Sara Paxton

IMDB Synopsis:
After kidnapping and brutally assaulting two young women, a gang led by a prison escapee unknowingly finds refuge at a vacation home belonging the parents of one of the victims -- a mother and father who devise an increasingly gruesome series of revenge tactics.

My Take:
Thank god they remade this movie as the original sucks. At least this 2009 version was more coherent and better acted. There was no stupid humor or that stupid soundtrack. And the chicks were way cuter.

Something Like:
I Spit on Your Grave

Memorable Quote:
Morton: You know Krug, considering the rather notorious nature of the prison you're headed to, I think I'd pray for something a little more substantial.

Final Verdict:
Better

Review : The Last House on the Left (1972)

Director:
Wes Craven

Genre : Crime / Horror

Main Attractions:
Sandra Peabody
David Hess

IMDB Synopsis:
After kidnapping and butchering two teenagers, a gang of rapists and murderers unknowingly seeks refuge with the parents of one of the victims.

My Take:
When it was listed as one of the most disturbing movie ever made, I was actually expecting a much more gruesome movie, but all I got was this softcore bullshit. Not just that, it also had all of the trademarks of a bad 70s movie; bad soundtrack, horrible acting, hideous plots. And somehow, they also tried to include some lame humor in it.

Something Like:
I Spit on Your Grave

Memorable Quote:
Krug Stillo: Listen to daddy. I want you to take the gun, and I want you to put it in your mouth, and I want you to turn around and blow your brains out. Blow your brains out, BLOW YOUR BRAINS OUT!

Final Verdict:
Softcore

Review : Heat (1995)

Director:
Michael Mann (Ali)

Genre : Drama / Crime

Main Attractions:
Al Pacino
Robert De Niro

IMDB Synopsis:
In Los Angeles, a gang of armed thieves is hitting serious targets - major banks, vaults, and armored cars. These thieves are led by arch-criminal Neal MacAuley. One of their operations, an armored-car robbery, goes bad and the armored-car guards are murdered by the gunmen - putting LAPD homicide detective Vince Hanna on the trail of the thieves. Hanna knows it will take a lot to bring these dangerous, armed thieves down, and it will end in a horrifying gun battle when the thieves try to rob a major federal bank.

My Take:
It was the 90’s, where Al Pacino and De Niro were at their prime, making all the right movies for guys. The acting was great and the story although might be too long, still really good. Personally, I would like it better if they cut a few loose side stories.

Something Like:
Face/Off

Memorable Quote:
Neil McCauley: A guy told me one time, "Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner." Now, if you're on me and you gotta move when I move, how do you expect to keep a... a marriage?

Final Verdict:
Awesome

Review : Kids (1995)

Director:
Larry Clark (Ken Park)

Genre : Drama

Main Attractions:
Leo Fitzpatrick
Chloe Sevigny

IMDB Synopsis:
Kids follows a group young, unsupervised, not mature, but all-too-grown-up kids in New York. One girl has just been diagnosed with HIV and is trying to notify the boy who gave it to her, who is on a quest to sexually prey upon innocent girls. The film follows these characters and their friends through the day, hanging out, playing, carousing, and going to parties. Each scene is intriguing and disturbing -- conveying an urban reality that includes drugs, sex, guns, and disease; and yet never letting you forget these are *kids*, some of them barely in puberty.

My Take:
People said that this is one of the most disturbing movie ever made. Personally, I think it’s boring as shit. Maybe it’s because they just showed lame teenagers going about their everyday business or maybe because I just couldn’t relate. I just want them to show more naked chicks.

Something Like:
Ken Park

Memorable Quote:
Telly: Virgins. I love 'em. No diseases, no loose as a goose pussy, no skank. No nothin. Just pure pleasure.

Final Verdict:
Boring

Review : Blow (2001)

Director:
Ted Demme

Genre : Drama / Crime

Main Attractions:
Johnny Depp
Penelope Cruz

IMDB Synopsis:
A boy named George Jung grows up in a struggling family in the 1950's. His mother nags at her husband as he is trying to make a living for the family. It is finally revealed that George's father cannot make a living and the family goes bankrupt. George does not want the same thing to happen to him, and his friend Tuna, in the 1960's, suggests that he deal marijuana. He is a big hit in California in the 1960's, yet he goes to jail, where he finds out about the wonders of cocaine. As a result, when released, he gets rich by bringing cocaine to America. However, he soon pays the price.

My Take:
Depp was exceptional as always and Cruz was adorable although only appear intermittently. Cool movie and definitely one of the best when it comes to drugs.

Something Like:
Goodfellas

Memorable Quote:
George: Danbury wasn't a prison, it was a crime school. I went in with a Bachelor of marijuana, came out with a Doctorate of cocaine.

Final Verdict:
Cool

Review : Above The Rim (1994)

Director:
Jeff Pollack

Genre : Drama / Sport

Main Attractions:
Duane Martin
Tupac Shakur

IMDB Synopsis:
Story of Kyle-Lee Watson, a promising high school basketball star, and his relationships with Birdie, a powerful drug dealer, and Birdie's brother, Thomas 'Shep' Sheppard, himself once a promising high school star at Kyle's school, now employed as a security guard.

My Take:
Definitely one of the best basketball films. Great skills and great music. And there’s Tupac Shakur. Of course I loved it. Other than that, just your typical black movie.

Something Like:
White Men Can’t Jump

Memorable Quote:
Bugaloo: Yo Kyle, I didn't know you was uncircumcised. Yo, Your dick look like an anteater.

Final Verdict:
Good Bball film

Genuflect

Down on your knees.

Huh???

I want to wash your hair….. Please.

OK.

…………….

…………….

Now, that you’re in that pose… propose to me.

I’m down on both knees. It needs to be only on one for a proposal.

Really?

Of course, like you’re the queen or something.

OK. So, get on one knee then.

Emmm….. Can I just give you oral instead?

Sure.

Review : Miller’s Crossing (1990)

Director:
Joel Coen

Genre : Drama / Crime

Main Attractions:
Gabriel Byrne
Marcia Gay Harden

IMDB Synopsis:
Tom Regan is an advisor to Leo, a crime boss in an unnamed Prohibition-era town. When Leo and rival boss Johnny Caspar feud over a bookie who's been cheating Caspar, Tom tries to keep the peace. Instead he finds himself caught in the middle of a war of ambushes and shifting allegiances where nothing is ever quite what it seems.

My Take:
I got two problems with this movie. First, the main character relied too much on luck and the second would be the fact that the hottest girl they could get was Marcia Gay Harden.

Other than that, a solid gold from the Coen. Great storyline and interesting characters and script.

Personally, this movie is right at the top of the best work by the Coen brothers. As good as The Big Lebowski and better than Fargo.

Something Like:
Fargo

Memorable Quote:
Tom Reagan: All in all not a bad guy - if looks, brains and personality don't count.

Final Verdict:
One of the best Coen’s works

Review : Happiness (1998)

Director:
Todd Solondz

Genre : Drama / Comedy

Main Attractions:
Jane Adams
Philip Seymour Hoffman

IMDB Synopsis:
When a young woman rejects her current overweight suitor in a restaurant, he unexpectedly places a curse on her. The film then moves on to her sisters. One is a happily married woman with a psychiatrist husband and three kids. Unfortunately the husband develops an unnatural fascination for his 11 year old son's male classmates, fantasizes about mass killing in a park, and masturbates to teen magazines. One of his patients has an unrequited fascination for the third sister. Meanwhile the apparently stable 40 year marriage of the sister's parents suddenly unravels when he decides he has had enough and wants to live a hermit's life in Florida. Obviously, the whole movie is slightly warped in its viewpoint and certainly presents abnormal relationships among all of its parties.

My Take:
This movie tackled the topic of child molestation in a very acute way that it’ll be hard for some to watch this. Other than that, the various representations of wackjobs that they have made the movie quite special and cynical. Great cast and great acting by most.

Something Like:
Running with Scissors

Memorable Quote:
Helen Jordan: If only I had been raped as a child! *Then* I would know authenticity!

Final Verdict:
Quite disturbing

Review : Nekromantik (1987)

Director:
Jorg Buttgereit

Genre : Drama / Horror

Main Attractions:
Daktari Lorenz
Beatrice Manowski

IMDB Synopsis:
Graphic, low-budget gore-shocker about Rob and Betty, a couple of ordinary necrophiles who apparently don't mind if their dead sexual partners are not so fresh. Rob's job affords him the opportunity to bring home corpses and the odd body part; when he loses his job, he loses Betty, and Rob's life gets REALLY bizarre.

My Take:
I don’t see why people would make this kind of filth and called it a movie. It’s basically a short film about necrophilia. And those corpses weren’t fresh at all, just skeleton with some skins with juices oozing from their eyes. It’s freaking disgusting. The only consolation was, the girl was quite cute.

Something Like:
Visitor Q

Memorable Quote:
Betty: Left for good. Took the corpse.

Final Verdict:
Not entertainment

Maybe....

In an early morning few years back, after a night of passion, a girl sends me a present with a card thanking me for showing her the pleasure of being a woman.

Earlier this year, another girl confided that a session with me was enough to drive her crazy, that for the next two weeks, her head was filled with nothing but.

Recently, I’ve been informed that I have a magic touch.

Despite whatever you may feel about creationism or evolution, I started to believe that there were some major screw-ups somewhere along the line.

Maybe, just maybe, instead of a Homosapien, I was actually meant to be a sybian or a Jack Rabbit vibrator.

Review : Coach Carter (2005)

Director:
Thomas Carter

Genre : Drama / Sport

Main Attractions:
Samuel L. Jackson
Rob Brown

IMDB Synopsis:
In 1999, Ken Carter, a successful sporting goods store owner, accepts the job of basketball coach for his old high school in a poor area of Richmond, CA, where he was a champion athlete. As much dismayed by the poor attitudes of his players as well as their dismal play performance, Carter sets about to change both. He immediately imposes a strict regime typified in written contracts that include stipulations for respectful behavior, a dress code and good grades as requisites to being allowed to participate. The initial resistance from the boys is soon dispelled as the team under Carter's tutelage becomes a undefeated competitor in the games. However, when the overconfident team's behavior begins to stray and Carter learns that too many players are doing poorly in class, he takes immediate action. To the outrage of the team, the school and the community, Carter cancels all team activities and locks the court until the team shows acceptable academic improvement. In the ensuing debate, Carter fights to keep his methods, determined to show the boys that they need to rely on more than sports for their futures and eventually finds he has affected them more profoundly than he ever expected.

My Take:
Contained all the clichés that any black sports movie can bring. However, Jackson was pretty good being the coach, although not as powerful as Denzel. Great basketball games by talented players. Still, not as good as “White Men Can’t Jump’.

Something Like:
Remember the Titans

Memorable Quote:
Jason Lyle: You said we're a team. One person struggles, we all struggle. One person triumphs, we all triumph.

Final Verdict:
Typical

Review : Hoosiers (1986)

Director:
David Anspaugh

Genre : Drama / Sport

Main Attractions:
Gene Hackman
Barbara Hershey

IMDB Synopsis:
A classic tale of redemption, this film features a volatile coach and a former star player-turned alcoholic leading a small-town basketball team on an improbable run to the Indiana high school championship game. Coach Norman Dale encounters several hurdles in his path: a feisty teacher determined to keep the best player from going out for the team, a town chock full of second-guessing fathers, and a group of undisciplined athletes. Story inspired by the Milan (Indiana) Indians' state title of 1954.

My Take:
Since it’s not a black basketball movie, you won’t have the usual academic and gangster problem in school and all the cliché that the black movies bring. Also, you won’t be hearing cool rap tunes and the most important of all, no cool basketball moves. This movie did not motivate me to play basketball.

Something Like:
Friday Night Lights

Memorable Quote:
Opal Fleener: Sun don't shine on the same dog's ass everyday, but, mister you ain't seen a ray of light since you got here.

Final Verdict:
Not the best basketball movie

Review : Sunshine Cleaning

Director:
Christine Jeffs (Sylvia)

Genre : Crime / Thriller

Main Attractions:
Amy Adams
Emily Blunt

IMDB Synopsis:
In order to raise the tuition to send her young son to private school, a mom starts an unusual business -- a biohazard removal/crime scene clean-up service -- with her unreliable sister.

My Take:
For a feels good movie, it wasn’t really bad. The characters and storyline were interesting enough and will make you sympathize on their situation.

Something Like:
Waitress

Memorable Quote:
Rose Lorkowski: There's not a lot that I am good at. But I'm good at getting guys to want me. Not date me, or marry me, but want me.

Final Verdict:
Good enough

Review : Audition (1999)

Director:
Takashi Miike

Genre : Thriller / Horror

Main Attractions:
Ryo Ishibashi
Eihi Shiina

IMDB Synopsis:
A lonely Japanese widower whose son is planning to move out of the house soon expresses his sadness to a friend and fellow film producer, who becomes inspired to hold an audition for a non-existent film so that the widower can select a new potential bride from the resulting audition pool. The widower ultimately becomes enamored with and fascinated by one particular young woman...but first impressions can often be horribly wrong

My Take:
I’m not sure why the big brouhaha over this movie because I just don’t get it.
The first half of it was rather slow and innocent and the latter part was totally confusing and weird. Of course the torture part was quite special but personally, the best part for me would be the earlier scene when the girl was waiting for the phone call. Long-haired Japanese chicks will always be scary.

Something Like:
Any other Japanese horror film

Memorable Quote:
Asami Yamazaki: Kiri kiri kiri kiri kiri kiri!

Final Verdict:
Not for me

Review : The Usual Suspects (1994)

Director:
Bryan Singer (X-Men)

Genre : Crime / Thriller

Main Attractions:
Kevin Spacey
Gabriel Byrne

IMDB Synopsis:
Following a truck hijack in New York, five conmen are arrested and brought together for questioning. As none of them is guilty, they plan a revenge operation against the police. The operation goes well, but then the influence of a legendary mastermind criminal called Keyser Söze is felt. It becomes clear that each one of them has wronged Söze at some point and must pay back now. The payback job leaves 27 men dead in a boat explosion, but the real question arises now: Who actually is Keyser Söze?

My Take:
I would have enjoyed watching this movie more if I did not looking for some major twist at the end. The storyline and acting were good and interesting indeed. But I kind of suspected who’s the guy behind it from the beginning and that’s just spoiled it all.

Something Like:
Lucky Number Slevin

Memorable Quote:
Verbal: How do you shoot the devil in the back? What if you miss?

Final Verdict:
Good but a bit predictable